'I was very clear: no guests in my apartment': Cat owner cancels cat-sitter after she asked whether her homeless friend could stay in the house with the cat, the cat-sitter accuses the cat owner of overreacting

Mariel Ruvinsky • Writer and Editor

Jan 14, 2026 9:00 AM EST

Choosing a sitter for your cat is something that should be taken very seriously.

One red flag missed, and some of the weirdest situations can happen. We say that because we have seen it. Cat sitters might bail on you at the last moment, without proper warning. Cat sitters might steal from you, and then of course deny it, and you will have no way of knowing for sure. Cat sitters might let your cats outside, unsupervised, putting them at risk, despite the fact that you told them not to do it. Your cat is your family. You have to know who you are leaving it with.

Which is what makes the situation in this story quite… understandable to us. At first, this was a cat sitter that the cat owner trusted. It wasn't the first time that she took care of this person's cat. The trust was there. But the moment that she asked whether a complete stranger could be allowed to crash in the cat's home, that trust was broken. Of course, the whole situation could have been handled with more sensitivity, but the point still stands. This cat sitter knew how important it was for the owner for them to not bring strangers into their home. She knew.

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"[Am I overreacting] for canceling my cat sitter after she asked if a friend could stay in my apartment?"

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via 23-Hour-Day
Could this situation have been handled with a little more sensitivity? It probably could have been. But we do think that the reaction was justified and that you did not do anything wrong by changing your cat-sitter. Not having a stranger in your home was a clear - and very reasonable - boundary that you set, and although it's hard for us to be mad at them for simply asking the question, we do agree that it points to them not understanding that boundary. You don't want strangers near your things, you don't want strangers near your cat - that should be completely understandable.
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via Unsplash / Eleonora Catalano - 93norart93

Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.
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via 23-Hour-Day
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via Unsplash / Eleonora Catalano - 93norart93

Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.
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via Unsplash / Eleonora Catalano - 93norart93

Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.
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We would like to believe that she would not have let that man into your home had you told her no but kept her on, but that's exactly the thing - there would have been no way to know for sure. Maybe she trusts this person. Maybe she knows that they wouldn't steal anything or try to hurt the cat. But maybe she doesn't know, and this is simply a risk that she is willing to take - as long as that risk is in someone else's house. She could have volunteered her own apartment, but she did not, and we think that there had to have been a reason for that.
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via Unsplash / Eleonora Catalano - 93norart93

Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.
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via the_stooge_nugget